Covenant of Healthy Relationships
A covenant is a guide, understanding, and agreement of expectations as we enter into and maintain relationships with members and friends of the congregation, our minister, and staff.
Your Committee on Shared Ministry (COSM) is proposing an updated Covenant of Healthy Relationships (currently titled Covenant of Good Relations) for adoption at the October 9th, 2022 Special Meeting of the Membership. You may find the proposed and current versions below.
More information on this update will be shared at all of our three Town Hall Meetings. For more information on the Special Meeting, Town Hall Meeting dates, and voting on this proposal, click here.
Covenant of Healthy Relationships (Proposed, October 2022)
Being mindful of how we communicate with and about others, we will:
- Listen actively.
- Seek to understand the perspectives of others.
- Attend to the impact of our intentions, words, and actions.
When conflicts arise, in order to pursue a peaceful and constructive path to resolution, we will:
- If possible, communicate directly with the person(s) involved. If safety is a concern or if help is needed, consult the Committee on Shared Ministry as a resource to support communication and resolution.
- Stay engaged with the process of addressing harm, repairing relationship, and establishing a resolution to the conflict.
- Explore solutions through mutual learning and respect, trusting in others whose truths are based on their own lived experiences.
Celebrating the diversity within our community, we will:
- Recognize and honor the variety of beliefs and spiritual paths within our community, including the words and ways others express their spirituality.
- Honor the contributions of those who have been historically marginalized in the larger world and in our congregation.
This Covenant of Healthy Relationships, grounded in the principles and values of this congregation and our Unitarian Universalist tradition, upholds the foundation of our community at the Unitarian Society of Santa Barbara and our commitment to one another as members of this community. Our goal is to be a safe and inspirational place in which we, as individuals and as a congregation, can live out our spiritual journeys.
Covenant of Good Relations (Current, Adopted 2008)
Our Unitarian Universalist faith is not defined by a creed or a set of beliefs, but by our agreements to walk together through life with respect and love.
A “covenant” is an agreement about how to be together, a description of the behavior we aspire to, even when it is hard – especially when it is hard!
This covenant was created by the congregation in 2008 to articulate what it takes to create a healthy, sustainable and supportive community.
In my interactions with others in our congregation, I will:
- be receptive, listening with care and compassion;
- be truthful, speaking with care and compassion, and speaking directly to anyone with whom I have a concern;
- be committed to the group as a whole, honoring our long history as a congregation within the Unitarian Universalist tradition;
- expect that there will be differences among us and accept and care for one another despite those differences;
- remain engaged with gentleness and respect when times are uncertain, participate in the process, and do my part to sustain this Covenant;
- honor my responsibility for upholding the spiritual values, traditions and rituals of our community.